The Reg: Muslim clerics issue fatwa banning the devout from Mars One 'suicide' mission [Mon Feb 24 2014]

Daily Headlines 24 February 2014

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	The Road to Enterprise PaaS Learn how PaaS can benefit your organization to help you streamline your application development, allow you to use existing infrastructure and improve operational efficiencies. Download here >

Business News Bolshy investor pushes Juniper Networks into restructuring plan Hedge fund also gets two directors on the board Groupon plans MORE losses next quarter: Will lob wads of cash down marketing's maw Voucher bazaar's expensive bet Amazon fuses LoveFilm, subs service, calls it Prime Instant Video Sticking it to Netflix in the UK Channel News Entanet calls on equity firm Mobeus to back £14m MBO No longer 'restrained by group policy' chimes MD Chen Data Centre News Something rotten stalks the Cloud Kingdom Sysadmin Blog The Empire of Sadness is coming for YOU and your licenses I'd rather hire lesser but 'agreeable' bod than arrogant rocket scientist Nimble Storage CEO on corp culture, post-IPO plans Just how much bang does a FAS8040 box give you for 500,000 bucks Blocks and Files New NetApp array test-driven in SPC-1 benchmark Red Hat kicks Piston out of Red Hat Summit, then performs $13,000 U-turn Exclusive Fallout blamed on tussle over huge cloud contract win Daddy EMC pushes past VMware, muscles into Microsoft Hyper-V shops You heard it right: Windows cloud is EMC's next big thing Microsoft taps up Level 3, Equinix, AT&T for direct Azure Cloud lines Psst, don't tell the NSA. Oh, darn it 'Sons of Solaris' Joyent welcome Ubuntu into their cloud My enemy's enemy is my friend, explains engineering chief BOFH: He... made... you... HE made YOU a DOMAIN ADMIN? Episode 2 Simon, are you breathing? Simon! Reg HPC man relives 0-day rootkit GROUNDHOG DAY HPC blog Okay, campers, rise and shine, and don't forget your booties... Hot racks and cool customers: Colocating in the capital Feature Where diesel, data and dark fibre meet VMware hyper-converge means WE don't NEED no STEENKIN' OS... ...in our virtual machines, says Reg man Chris Mellor SUSE's new OpenStack is Havana good time with VMware and EMC Multi-stack private clouds are go in SUSE Cloud 3 Hardware News Microsoft courts mobe-makers, tweaks Windows 8 for WIMPs MWC Windows Phone rules eased to allow cheaper phones by folks other than Nokia We nearly MISSED OUT on iOS7 redesign: But someone snatched Jony Ive from the jaws of quit Day-glo culprit unmasked Years of AWOL Windows Phone features finally show up in video leaks Long overdue 'quiet hours' function so WinPho fans can catch some shuteye Toshiba Encore: The Windows 8.1 tablet that might catch on Review Don't be fooled by the fondleslab's feel... Magnets to stick stuff to tablets: Yup, there's an Apple patent application for that Surely there's no 'prior art' for this brilliant innovation, eh? Alliance for Wireless Power to pursue new 50W standard Dell's clambers aboard standards group's magnetic resonance bandwagon Networks News Google's 1Gbps fiber 'not driving' Time Warner Cable's sudden Austin speed increase Telco was planning to do it ALL ALONG, honest The Road to Enterprise PaaS Learn how PaaS can benefit your organization to help you streamline your application development, allow you to use existing infrastructure and improve operational efficiencies. Download here > Policy News G20 gives Google, Microsoft, Apple et al tax deadline G20 finance ministers speak loudly, mention big stick Microsoft asks pals to help KILL UK gov's Open Document Format dream Cabinet Office blasted for 'ignoring benefits' and 'limiting choice' TONGUES OUT if you want to LICK Steve Jobs' BACKSIDE US Postal Service to put dead Apple chief's fizzog on stamps Big 20 cash hoovers: Slurp. Floop. Darn. Sluurrrp. Where's our public sector IT dosh? Mad Frankie Maude's Cabinet Office axemen prise open firms' grip on taxpayer cash Bosses to be banned from forcing new hires to pull personal records ICO warns employers on subject access requests South Korea green lights Stuxnet-like code weapons to nark NORKS Nuke it from cyberspace, it's the only way to be sure Security News Saving private spying: IETF reveals crypto-busting proxy proposal 'Explicit Trusted Proxy' would allow carriers to decrypt data to speed transmission Apple promises SSL snooping fix for Mac OS X 10.9 users 'very soon' Don't trust that dial server certificate Harvard student thrown off 14,000-core super ... for mining Dogecoin Wow. Very misuse. Much banned. 'For fairly obvious reasons' Google nets Spider.io to thwart fraudsters Click-fraud specialist heads to Mountain View Uni of Maryland hacked: 300,000 SSNs of staff, students, alumni swiped Secret Service called in after NSA's favorite campus ravaged Update your iThings NOW: Apple splats scary SSL snooping bug in iOS Updated2 OS X Mavericks still VULNERABLE, millions at risk of web hijacking Robot army to police football World Cup They inspected Fukushima, now it's Brazil's turn ... Software News Microsoft may slash price of Windows 8.1 on cheap 'slabs Report says 70 per cent discount for OEMs willing to make sub-$US250 devices Collective SSL FAIL a symptom of software's cultural malaise Apple, WhatsApp and Belkin show that if you ask for bad software, you get bad software Jolla announces Sailfish OS 1.0, says Android love-fest soon to come Just the latest of Finnish firm's monthly updates You’re a LIAR and a CHEAT... la-la-la, I can't hear your lawyers Something for the Weekend, Sir? Reputation app Reput: You cut me deep, man Sanity now: Gnome 3.12 looking sensible - at least in beta Review Even baring your privates to world+dog isn't compulsory any more Science News Curiosity now going BACKWARDS There's no spare parts shop on Mars Muslim clerics issue fatwa banning the devout from Mars One 'suicide' mission Martian mavericks bite back with Quran quotes 'Polar vortex' or not, last month among the WARMEST Januaries EVER RECORDED Is warm-up mucking up climate and weather? Rush Limbaugh is certain; scientists aren't Self-forming liquid metal just like a TERMINATOR emerges from China lab The future's not set. There's no fate but what we make for ourselves – oh Intel, Sun vet births fast, inexpensive 3D chip-stacking breakthrough Cranky, costly through-silicon vias replaced by inductive coils Antarctic glacier 'melted JUST as fast LONG before human carbon emissions' Nothing new going on at Pine Island, insist British boffins French youth faces court for illegal drone flight 'Nancy from the air' vid lands lad in hot water Missing matter found by squinting through gravitational lens Fancy new particles not needed as Planck team weighs galaxies anew Google picks five teams to share $6 MEEELLION funding in Lunar X Prize Still on schedule for 2015 Moon landing Bootnotes News Terrifying photo special: 'Electric Cannon' anal orgasmo-probe in use ... on a BULL Our snapper suffers lifelong mental scars, now you can too NHS care.data leaflet shovage: Like a 'notice for Earth's demolition' posted to Alpha Centauri Quotw Plus: It's good to know that PARODY Is still legal Just like Elvis, dead Steve Jobs to appear all over America in 2015 Your chance to lick Apple baron's backside The Road to Enterprise PaaS Learn how PaaS can benefit your organization to help you streamline your application development, allow you to use existing infrastructure and improve operational efficiencies. 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