The Reg: 'Dammit! This BLACK HOLE just isn't BLACK AT ALL' snarl boffins [Fri Nov 29 2013]

Daily Headlines 29 November 2013

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	Hybrid storage performance leadership Tolly evaluates the performance of ioControl against conventional hybrid storage to find ioControl provided up to 700% better performance in block level access tests. Download here >

Business News Report says Microsoft has divided CEO list into possibles and probables And Stephen Elop's not a probable Happy Thanksgiving, Apple. Now how about THREE more patent legal battles for dessert? Brace yourself for more jury trials Symantec BACKS OUT of Backup Exec.cloud Shuts down unloved cloud storage service Google decides Chromecast TV-stick apps are a whole NEW THING As yet another tellydongle scoops crowdfunding to leap into moshpit with pals Krakoom! OCZ flies into the ground. Time to salvage the engines and look around Blocks and Files Hey, where is everyone? In a room with a flash fab operator Assange flick The Fifth Estate branded 'WORST FILM OF THE YEAR' Even Benedict Cumberbatch can't drown out Swedish sex crime allegations Samsung to spend ENTIRE budget of London 2012 OLYMPICS... on ADS Chaebol launches super-spendy $14bn-a-year plan Fujitsu: Sayonara, London Stock Exchange... You're not worth the money Set to delist by January to 'reduce administrative work and costs' Salesforce stuffs CRM dollars into Benioff's package Onlookers shocked at size of bulge BT fattens flabby Global Services biz to puff and huff way to £32bn Hopes to be the company that ate ALL the pies BT performs INSOURCERY on outsourced staffers to secure cash savings Buys in 282 front desk staff from Securitas as contract terminates Managing your business devices through System Center 2012 Free live training InTune and Configuration Manager step up Microsoft hires Pawn Stars to shaft Google Redmond's Scroogled campaign shifts into new gear Samsung hauls in chiefs for 'CRISIS awareness' confab – report Are sales of the Galaxy S4 as bad as rumors suggest? Singaporean finn-off 'Newkia' readies Android phones Former Asian execs shuffle deck chairs, alphabet, with new venture Barnes & Noble's Nook sales take a long walk off a very short pier People won't buy the ebooks if they aren't buying the readers Channel News Phoenix IT Group blames former CEO and economy for woes Sales slide continues... still it's nearly Christmas Data Centre News I dived deep into the VMware community. Here's what I found... Sysadmin blog Our man Trevor Pott discovers who's vWho and what's vWhat Meet the cluster teams: Team Quokka and Team Germany HPC blog First Look at SC13 Aussie and German teams Meet the cluster teams: Chinese Fortune Rookies, Team Venus 2.0 HPC blog First look at SC13 Team NUDT and Team Pacific Storage giant EMC, rival upstart Pure Storage trade new charges It's WAR: Hopkinton and Pure each throw new sueball... on THE SAME DAY EMC: Backup is BROKEN, do you hear me? Now buy this other thing Comment It's copy data management, dude, not data protection Dropbox dropouts and biz rebels: Stay in control ... inhale your own cloud Build your own cloud - part 2 Business gets personal WTF is … MU-MIMO? It's part of 802.11ac Wave 2, but quit with the '6 Gbps WiFi' already Hong Kong Bitcoin miners pour datacentre in a FISH TANK Virtual currency prospectors go underwater for best results THIS ONE WEIRD CHIP cuts weight from data centre power bills Korean boffin designs frugal data clock recovery silicon for 100GBE kit Hardware News Anglo-Australian cricket brawl spills over into coding clash Cricket 2013 game ditched after dev drops the ball Microsoft Surface slabs borked by heat-induced DIM SCREEN OF DEATH Turkey-chomping Redmond says nowt as punters rage on forums PS4 as Black Friday looms: TOUGH, you CAN'T HAVE ONE! If you didn't order it before 14 November, too bad, says Amazon DEATH-PROOF your old XP netbook: 5 OSes to bring it back to life Or: How to talk your child out of using an iPad.. Mass Effect: Ten lightweight laptops that won’t bust your back Product Roundup A selection of skinny notebooks that put the ‘ability’ in ‘portability’ Sinclair's FORGOTTEN Australia-only micro revealed! Behold the 'Telecom Australia Computerphone' in all its splendour Chinese prof brands gamers no better than drug dealers 'Spiritual narcotics' enslave youth and leave them in a stupour Look! Up in the sky! It's a CLONED-DRONE PANORAMA-PINCHER Boffin puts quadaracopters in harness for YOUR holiday snaps Ex-Nokia team unveil Jolla smartphone with added Sailfish OS Sailfish OS comes with added Android support Networks News NBNCo leak: They would say that, wouldn't they? Reported Blue Book leak reads like bureaucrats in denial Hybrid storage performance leadership Tolly evaluates the performance of ioControl against conventional hybrid storage to find ioControl provided up to 700% better performance in block level access tests. Download here > Policy News Why a plain packaging U-turn from UK.gov could cost £3bn a year Analysis How's the Aussie cigarette experiment doing? Not so well Beastie Boys parody sueball tennis ends after toy firm yanks Girls Cult rappers fight for their right to NEVER FEATURE IN ADS Apple dodges data privacy sueball: Fanbois didn't RTFM*, says judge They never bothered to read the privacy policy... so they have no case DVLA declares J14 HAD on BU14 SHT and SL14 AGS Oh BU63 GER, as banned numberplate list grows Security News Think unpatched Win XP hole's not a big deal? Hope you trust your local users Vulnerability used to breathe life into Adobe Reader exploit, Microsoft warns You have a Skype voicemail. PSYCHE! It's just some fiendish Trojan-flinging spam UK plod warn punters NOT to unzip those files Weird PHP-poking Linux worm slithers into home routers, Internet of Things Targets x86 but ARM, MIPS, PPC mutants lurking, we're told Google: YouTube fights off HUGE ASCII PHALLUS MENACE Pr0ntastic commenters are having their way with Google Software News Why BURN Facebook after reading when you can 'save it for later'? All a question of stickability ... bitch Looks like Google may ask you to PAY for YouTube music - report No ads on millions of songs, but plenty of ads on millions more? Google to CyanogenMod: YOU! GIT yore warranty-BUSTING ASS outa Play Alternative firmware installer pulled from Google Play Microsoft squashes Exchange Server bug A shot at beating backup borkage Science News Boffins release 44-MEEELLION-star Hitch hikers Guide to the Galaxy Longitudinal sky survey finds 250,000 objects have changed over 60 years RIP Comet ISON: ???-2013. We hardly knew ye European Space Agency calls it: space rock is pining for the fjords Sceptic-bait E-Cat COLD FUSION generator goes on sale for $US1.5m Sealed box claimed to turn nickel and hydrogen into copper and electricity WATCH LIVE: Comet ISON DESTROYED by Sun, NASA brains fear Live video Drop that turkey - THIS doesn't happen every year! 'Dammit! This BLACK HOLE just isn't BLACK AT ALL' snarl boffins Possibly something it ate COMPLETE, FIFTY-FOOT DINOSAUR sold to MYSTERIOUS, reclusive bidder for £480k 'Will be available for public viewing' - like Jurassic Park Exciting new BRAZILIAN PUSSY FINGERED by overjoyed boffins 'Tigrinas' actually come in more than one variety False widow spiders in guinea pig slaughter horror Lock up your pets, warns shaken British mum Hybrid storage performance leadership Tolly evaluates the performance of ioControl against conventional hybrid storage to find ioControl provided up to 700% better performance in block level access tests. Download here >

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