The Reg: Shy, bashful HUMPBACK DOLPHINS expose themselves to boffins [Thu Oct 31 2013]

Daily Headlines 31 October 2013

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	ioControl - hybrid storage performance leadership Tolly evaluates the performance of ioControl against conventional hybrid storage to find ioControl provided up to 700% better performance in block level access tests. Download here >

Business News Twitter duped us, coupon-clippers claim Lawsuit lands ahead of IPO Facebook Zucks up $2bn sales, record profit - but stock fell. What gives? More mobile users and more ads added up to a solid quarter SAP: We just can't gobble BlackBerry. We're stuffed with 'mobile solutions' Says mobe-maker just won't 'fit' NASDAQ exchange stumbles AGAIN after 'human error' snafu Some trading halted but stocks still moving, says exchange Apple under CEO Angela Ahrendts? A no-foam iPad with dash of vanilla Analysis Cupertino without a new Jobs is the skinny latte of computing Gasp! Twitter displays pictures in main feed as IPO looms For now, it's just Drake Hands*, but prepare yourselves for the ad tsunami Microsoft investors advised: Sack the guy searching for Ballmer replacement 'Conflict of interest' for John Thompson, say watchdogs Channel News Arrow: global macro still 'unsettled" as profits dip Large corporate tech buyers spending again? Maybe not... afterall Bloated tech reseller Systemax may be turning around, but it's still going the wrong way Numbers hit the skids, CEO 'disappointed' as slide toward doom continues Microsoft dumps two distributors overboard in Blighty cull Unlucky pair weren't part of Redmond's 'devices and services' revolution Data Centre News Microsoft's Windows Azure Compute cloud goes TITSUP GLOBALLY Looks like a distributed system, breaks like a single tenant What do we want? Strong consistency! When do we... oh, it's in Riak v2 RICON West 2013 NoSQL datastore flexes muscles to woo enterprises What's MariaDB? Google stitches MySQL Wire Protocol into its cloud Do not as I do, but as I say, says MariaDB lover Speaking in Tech: 'Pure Storage is defined by... Vaughn Stewart's hairdo' Podcast Plus: 'LinkedIn's just a giant public Rolodex' Users and customers stressing your systems? Tell us how you cope Readers Secure, manageable, scalable? Speak your brains and we'll tell you what EVERYONE ELSE said Fusion-io founder Flynn gets $50m fuel to get Primary Data flying Server flash upstart receives B-round funding – report Hybrid heaven: Systems Centre Virtual Machine Manager and Windows Azure Hands-on We show you how to get them on the same page EMC braces self for November's flashy XTremIO launchgasm Hopkinton makes a play at the array world WD slips bullet between teeth, gets ready to hand $706 MEELLION to Seagate Alright guys, change the black ink refills for red. Dammit Fusion-io fortifies flashy SAN box - but it lacks handy real-world features Shane Robison's rescue squad still on the uphill stretch HGST pops out 1TB fondleslab disc as thin as a digestive biscuit Well, roughly. Also claims to have piled the previous model high, if not sold it cheap Microsoft creates new cert to make VMware admins 'bi-lingual' Parlez-vous Hyper-V? Non? Redmond has free training to 'future-proof your career' Hardware News Google's next-gen Glass headsets look ... well ... much like the old ones Pics First photos reveal new in-ear audio system iPHONE 5S BATTERY RECALL: Drop the mobe, fanboi, for your own good More power in your pocket? Yes, about that... DEAD STEVE JOBS actor becomes ENGINEER at Lenovo Trivia: Ashton Kutcher actually DID study engineering. Sort of Lenovo stands up supple new Yoga tablet: Quite rinky-dinky ‘Multimode’ Android 4.2 gadget to be your flexible friend? Like iPads? Like stuff called AIR? Don't miss our REVIEW ROUNDUP-squared Our Media Boildown™ technique rebooted HOLY how-did-we-get-here?: Batman Arkham Origins Review It’s Dark-Knight-by-numbers as a new developer takes over the series Dell users get their claws out as Ultrabooks burp 'FOUL CAT URINE STINK' 'I have had to apologize to clients for the horrible smell' One in five Australian punters to buy wearable tech in 2014: report The lesson for the rest of the world? Don't take surveys too seriously Networks News Vocus turning Manly spur into a ring Five minutes from fibre, a thousand miles from care ARM flexes muscle: Forget iPhone 5S's 64-bit edge – it will soon be standard ARM TechCon Chip designer's mobile man: 'We'll play at the top end, the middle, and the bottom' Google's new broadband offer: 20-days of WiFi for a quid Balloon-busting service only in Indonesia ... for now ioControl - hybrid storage performance leadership Tolly evaluates the performance of ioControl against conventional hybrid storage to find ioControl provided up to 700% better performance in block level access tests. Download here > Policy News NSA, UK hacked Yahoo! and Google data center interconnects – report Project MUSCULAR taps millions of YOUR records a month Cops PULL OVER Google Glass driver, ticket her for wearing techno-goggles Tough CHiPS for wearable computing Want to go to billionaire Sun kingpin's beach? Hope you're a strong swimmer Co-founder cites 1848 law from before state of CALIFORNIA EXISTED You're more likely to get a job if you study 'social' sciences, say fuzzy-studies profs It's OK! No need to work hard at university after all! Laurie Love investigation stretches to Australia, Sweden A Brit, a Swede and two Aussies walked through a firewall ... Infosys set for $35m fine over US visa naughtiness Report says company undercut rivals by using cheap B-1 visas instead of pricier H1-B Security News Crypto protocols mostly crocked says euro infosec think-tank ENISA Get ready to change ciphers and double key lengths if you want to live Lavabit and Silent Circle form Dark Mail Alliance to kill off email snooping Plans to open source end-to-end email encryption for all So many 'cyberspying hackers' about... and most of you are garbage RSA Europe 2013 You're living off your reputation, sniff infosec boffins Site News El Reg intros post editing for all Readers' corner Ten minute window to clean up your typos Software News Cisco: We'll open-source our H.264 video code AND foot licensing bill Plus binaries for free streaming vid for all ... what's the catch? Migrating from Windows XP: Time to move on Webcast Live demos at El Reg on 21 Nov Twitter, ARM voted on to Java steering committee London Java Community also wins another two year stint on governing body Science News Dark matter still missing after 100-day experiment Hard-to-find stuff doesn't want to be found: is that a surprise? Shy, bashful HUMPBACK DOLPHINS expose themselves to boffins Fourth variety of brainy mammals spotted off northern Australia Bootnotes News HTC phone STOPS BULLET, saves Florida gas station clerk's life Lucky escape for attempted robbery victim ioControl - hybrid storage performance leadership Tolly evaluates the performance of ioControl against conventional hybrid storage to find ioControl provided up to 700% better performance in block level access tests. Download here >

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